It is not homosexual to truely admire a male for a quality he has and we lack. There would'nt have been this many male leaders and preachers if that was the case - that being said after ruefully accepting the fact that most of our male preachers - spirituals especially, do tend to go easy on their clothing - but thats a completely irrelevant, blasphemous, almost fatal consideration which frankly I would not like to, well, consider.

However, it is true that it is not less than a miracle how someone can mesmerize you into this beautiful stupor, that can force you to voluntarily be in that pitiful state - a smokey room in a smokey afternoon. Another day's work gone,the empty house smirks at you with its usual gloomy scum. Sometimes, you wonder if silence can speak after all, as noises created by you start sounding different. Well, if you can't use your voice to speak, you can always listen to somebody's voice. And you have the means to make it sound better.

And there it was, standing tall in the seventeen inch laptop window, mesmerizing me a zillionth time, these equally stupified humans who befriended that glorious era of music.

Those were the times when probably the Yankees used to look up at the sky for a Russian A- Bomb.

Weired timings....

picture yourself in a bamboo - shoot boat,
with tambourine plays in your ear.
slip out of your mind and slip out of the boat,
a great white shark wails at your rear.
picture yourself by a great white bad shark,
with tambourine plays in your ear.
the shark had had bunny, pain in the tummy,
you pat and say "hey mate don't fear".
picture yourself by the city medic store,
with tambourine plays in your ear.
the great white shark cries, "I shouldnt have those fries",
the doctor says "hold on oh dear!!"
picture yourself with a healthy white shark,
with tambourine plays in your ear.
"let's eat you my friend", the shark wags its end,
You say "join me, my home is near" .
picture yourself by the shiny new forks,
with tambourine plays in your ear.
"how do we start??", says the big white shark,
"with seafish" you shout - thats when the shark knew whats fear!!!

Somewhere....

" I will be there......yeah!!!"

Feb 15th.....6 more days..!!!!

And then there was light!!! It was almost surreal to see the birth of light in a dark dank world.....a galaxy in which there are no stars............the pefect absolute dark void, reasonably pleasant slightly lonely, infact very lonely, but somewhat satisfied comfort of anonymity.....several things in mind, but somehow even forcibly trying to forget them for just a couple of hours, willing to believe self - pittance might not be the easiest way, and willing to ponder on those more difficult ways, the improbable ways,ludicrously impossible life from the present life, numerous 'what ifs', few pangs and more smirks, all so clear in the black world in front of the eye, the kind of darkness which only a stupid astronaut having lost his way in the un-lit side of the earth would have felt.
It is ironic I dont remember which stanza of 'light my fire' it was, but I saw an almost transluscent patch of white light in front of me, it was almost ethereal, I realized it was coming from the ceiling, I was amazed at the impossibility of the situation, it was mystic, it was funny, this race with sanity and trance, untill sanity won as I realized with a jarring ringtone that it was my ringing cell phone's light reflected from the ceiling

"......c'mon baby light my fire.....!!!"

An air of Tranquility

The only thing that I remember clearly from last night is making of the perfect ideal airlines of the world with lowest possible "on - air" crew. I admit things have changed over last eighteen months.......and I certainly do travel a lot by plane rather than my college days where I used the train.To be honest, I had never travelled in a plane untill last eighteen months......not that I have found a secret gold mine, but yes I do travell in air.......mostly in credits. So, any ways, in college, I preferred the more mundane means of travel, mostly without ticket......which I believe is not possible on air!!So, yes, I guess things have changed.......that and an awful lot of downloaded episodes of "The Moment of truth"!!So framed, yet surprisingly catchy in a silly- wicked- perversely- satisfied kind of way!! I guess recent events do affectyour thoughts.
So we devised the ideal and most economical airlines. I would like to believe it is still hypothetical and I would appreciate if it remains that way for the rest of my life, but objectively speaking, it is not really hypothetical.I believe the cost of the airlines is because, other than the fact that it is actually on air, is because of its supposedly highly trained air crew.....

"...please fasten your seatbelts.....inflatable seats.....please put on your mask before helping others.......we have smoke detectors installed in your toilets".......

I guess these lines are infact pretty expensive!!!So we figured,reduction of 'on - air' crew will most definitely reduce the air-fare....and there it was.....

'Air Tranquility'.....the new ideal, energy-saving, the most economic airlines......actually I thought of the name just now. I thought, with sufficient amount of automation, a meaningful lot of software programming and sometime, pure brute force, it is infact possible to have an air-craft in which all other person, except the pilot is tranquilized!!!There cannot be a more fitting name to the airlines! I mean just think about it, a plane with all passenjers tranquilized, doped,out cold for the duration of flight......all strapped in the airport during take-off.....kids esepecially, or bloody first-timerstrying to act non-commital machos, they again wake up at their destination, such would be the pre-progammed amout of tranquilizer that would be shoved up their bottoms when they swipe their encoded one time expendable boarding passes and take their seats during the take off. That means no chance of those straps getting unbuckled, so no stupid demo required,no conscious passenjers, so no coffee, tea or stupid one-fifty rupees stale sandwitches (personally verified fact), no need of maintaining any toilet other than the one small one for the pilot, just in case before an eventual crash, no oxygen masks because in an average day,if you are in need of an oxygen mask some thousand feet above the ground, chances are high that you will die in any case eventually,no reading lights, no special chairs with retractable seats, no light in the plane except the one in the cockpit and of-course the wings, in fact not a single thing except maybe, you know, just for safety, Jim Morisson in low volume. And no air hostesses!!! You save energy, you save man-power,you do less pollution,you reduce if not eliminate totally the threat of highjacking ( I am not disallowing the possibility of the pilot being the high-jacker or even smugglin' one....we can put another few cops at the security) you save oxygen, you save the Earth.....!!!!!

Can you imagine? I actually agreed to donate seven rupees a day for a Green House shit!!??

How True.....

Incidentally my "Today's Fortune" in my orkut profile goes like this today :

"Education is the best provision for the journey to the old age"

Here I am......again...well its the middle of a pretty tricky state actually....trickybecause you never know whats in the store for you the next day....while couple of mid-nightsback I was mumbling the ten-millionth reason to feel vindicated at work.....the last few days have been quite fun.....to say the least.....in an old school sort of a way.
The trouble with these MNCs is their gandeur imposes a sense of falsified well-being thatmore often than not, tends to think on more financially-improbable-highly-palatable filmygrounds.....while there have been serious thoughts about a New Year in Bankok or Goa, all I could manage was a 150 KM ride to a shack of a place that I am sure would not incur the imagination of a single imaginative soul.....infact I am not sure how I fell into the decision of going there.....I believe it was mostly due to the omnipresent financial strikeout...anyways, this place has a few protrusion of powdery red lumps that people of this part of the country call a 'Hill'.....a stream of water flowing through the 'Hill'...few red faced sickly evil looking monkeys.....a large slimy dam,and a larger water body as a by product of the large slimy dam.....and an island with 2nd Century rockfaces of Budhdha....I am frankly more than bemused at the sadludicrity of the combination.....and incidentally we chose to 'scale the hill'....mainlybecause everything else was closed at that point in the morning.....till that point I was not sure if at all there is a waterfall sustainable by this 'Hill'....."snanum kadu"....an old fool withbones coming out from every part of his body said..I presumed that means "no bathing"....and got surprised and re-assured and went ahead
I trust a simple law of mountainering, I always judge the height of a land by the amountof trash littered over it....the more trash it carries,the less is the height of the land...and the trash this land carried was certainly not the maximum but ofcourse dangerously close to it.....but we did have our moments within the prickly wilds
and the rugged rocks and the close proximity of the waterfall....."snanum kadu".....so no fooling around in water.
There wasnt much descriptive about the dam....infact I always think, once you get over thesheer size of it, there is hardly anything more non-descriptive than an old dam.....but the water body was huge and it was a pretty 45 minutes steam launch ride to the island....in an old movie, the rugged cliffs of the island could have been passed
on as some secret nook in Greece, albeit at a significantly lesser height.......but of course on a closer glimpse there will be no second thoughts about the utter realization of its origin.

I do not know what Budhdha did here......or for that matter any of his cool disciples in this part of the country......but I saw some statues that I remember
seeing them in my junior school history books. Honestly it was almost surreal......as I always had this vision that these sculptures are either stolen or
locked up in a glass chamber with multiple key combinations. I do not regret of not having pursued a major in history.....and I could not manage anything
more than few appreciative nods and shrugs.....but it was nice by all means.....Oh I almost forgot,the island was where one of my friend was mercifully relieved of an excruciating unruly bowel malfunctionI guess Budhdha had a good sense of humor.
So that was my new year....On a strictly tourism scale, this trip would not even pass a meagre one, but I guess it did a good job!